"As Augustine wrote in his Confessions, 'The tears . . . streamed down, and I let them flow as freely as they would, making of them a pillow for my heart. On them it rested.' Grief is a form of validation; it says the wound mattered. It mattered. You mattered. That's not the way life was supposed to go. There are unwept tears down in there - the tears of a little girl who is lost and frightened. The tears of a teenage girl who's been rejected and has no place to turn. No one understands. The tears of a woman whose life has been hard and lonely and nothing close to her dreams. Let them come." (Captivating)
And I would add... the tears of a daughter who misses her mom and all her beautiful and crazy traits. The tears of a daughter who can no longer call and listen to her mother's voice. The tears of a daughter who, while out shopping, sees things she would like to buy for her mom but now can't. The tears of a daughter who wants to keep redecorating her mom's house and watch her continue to sneak in her eclectic decor. The tears of a daughter who just wants to snuggle with and get hugs from her mom. The tears of a daughter who wishes her mom could be here to wipe away the tears.
So as they (tears) come and come they do, I am reminded and am so thankful that God hears my prayers, sees my tears, and promises to heal (2 Kings 20:5). I am reminded that my wounds matter. I am reminded and eternally grateful that I have a wonderful hope that there is coming a day when God will wipe away every tear from our eyes, and death will be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore (Rev 21:4). And when that day comes, both my mom and I will be together again and we will both be just who he created us to be ~ oh, what a wonderful day that will be! Until then, my tears will flow and I will find comfort in knowing that God sees my tears ~ and not only does he see them ~ he keeps an account of every one of them (Ps 56:8)! And I will find comfort in the hope that lies ahead.
